Tuesday
Aug172010
Focus
August 17, 2010 
I am sitting at my desk on my lunch hour, sipping a cup of chilled cucumber soup*. I was completely grounded this past week, working to a routine, feeling inspired, I thought I had myself organized to sit and write on Sunday. And then like all good plans, my plan grew misty and out of focus as it faded away when we decided to list our house for sale. Yes, again - it didn’t sell the first time around. As we shifted our focus we found ourselves meeting with realtors, fluffing and folding for a photography session, making charts about financial expectations and focusing completely on the house. As I sit here trying to focus on this piece, my head is filling with mental post-it notes, little multi-coloured stickums gathering on the walls of my cranium, “clean the oven”, “pull the weeds in the back garden”, “organize the linen cupboard”, “blah blah”, “This”, “That”!!! I realize that in shifting focus, I have no focus. Being out of focus distresses me, I cannot operate in chaos. Tonight I will have to pull out a notebook, a fresh new one, I have the one my sister bought me on our holiday – it will be perfect to keep me organized.
The thought of making a list calms me, I can choose a few things each day, focus on them and get everything done without wearing myself out. I can make notes of who I talk to and when we talked, who is doing what and when they are doing it. One green notebook, a saviour that will take the pressure off my brain. Even without the book in hand, I proceed to plan my evening, choosing one or two projects that I can accomplish that will have a big impact. The most important being to make some lists.
My focus shifts back to the present for a moment, the cucumber soup is lovely, crunchy and cold, sweet and tart. As quickly as I focus on the taste, my mind shifts and surprises me with the knowledge that it is Tuesday.
I pick up my box of vegetables & fruit from my organic farmer every Tuesday. As a member of a Community Supported Agriculture Farm I am enjoying the bounty of the season. Tuesday night means pulling on an apron and spending a few hours in my gorgeous kitchen ensuring that the freshness of summer is sealed away so that this winter we can enjoy the fruits of my labours … pots boiling, ice baths ready, freezer bags labeled, that’s what Tuesday night is. So tonight I have that to add to the list. Oops.
My focus shifts to the future. I have registered for a credit course in advanced photography which will start September 14. Every Tuesday night for a semester. Oh. Tuesday. Double oops.
I have to grab that notebook the minute I get home and put it in to service, it would seem that I have double booked myself all the while expecting that I will keep the house in sparkling condition. Triple oops.
What am I going to focus on? I only have so many hours in an evening. What have I done? I can feel the panic rising.
Okay, stop, breathe & focus. I know what I’ve done and I know what I can do. I can consciously decide that this is an exciting time, a time of moving forward and learning, a time of planning and preparing for the future, this time is what it is, this time is now. I CAN do it all, one thing at a time and I will accomplish this spectacular feat by focusing on right now.
Right now means enjoying my soup and when my soup, like this essay, is done, I shall say, “Yum.”And move on to the next thing on the list in my green book.
XO
Kath
*seriously easy: peel & chop 2 cups of cucumber, add 2 cups greek style yogurt, 2 tsp honey, 2 tsp chopped mint, 1 clove of garlic – blend with an immersion or stand blender and serve very cold
Reader Comments (12)
What a fresh image this photo leaves you with, bright colors, so vivid.
Yes...one thing at a time...one foot in front of another..one breath followed by the next. Just breathe and stay in this moment!!
Love the colorful image. So beautifully 'summer'!!!
Just last weekend, Kath, we were given the fruits of labor from someone else's garden and this week have been "luxuriating" in them. I can imagine what you feel like every Tuesday! And that cucumber soup sounds so good. I wonder if Holland's kwark will work the same as the Greek yogurt? It's worth a try.
I don't know how people can operate without a to-do list during hectic times...but you sound like the Mother of all to-do lists. Seriously. I feel like I need to go take a nap now after reading this. :) And if I'm not mistaken, you also go to work each day! I wish you success this time around on selling your house. It's definitely one way to stay on top of keeping it clean. Trust me. I've been there. :)
wait wait wait!!! stop loading up the freezer. hopefully in a few weeks or a short month or two you won't even own one! focus on that for a minute mrs. cook, bake and freeze. i am excited for you and the barry and i see a quick sale. xoxo
I love you guys! Marcie emailed me last night and pointed out that I’m on a Wednesday slot here at Vision and Verb thereby necessitating attention to posting on Tuesday nights, she took control and suggested that she move me to another day. Thanks Marcie! She also suggested unrolling the yoga mat, which I will do, I just haven’t decided whether I will lie down on it and have a nap or actually do yoga. Margie? No, the horrors, I cannot think about not having a freezer, I shall continue to fill it up and it will travel with me. However, I see a copycat novel in my future, Freeze Pray Eat, one woman’s life as she gets overwhelmed by the amount of produce coming through the front door!
that soups sounds delicious, I'll try it soon (we do have Greek Yoghurt over here ;-) ) I can feel the hectics just reading it. good luck on the sale!
Thank you for the recipe! I will love to have a cup...
I cannot envision my welfare without a deep freeze.At the end of the day your dinner is right on hand.Like Your picture, made me want some lettuce. Mom
i write lists on scraps of paper, or talk into my phone recorder, or try to remember (am quite good at thinking of something as i fall asleep, and remembering it the following morning), but otherwise am absolutely useless at keeping everything focused and together! have rather learned to live with it :)
My cranium is also full of sticky notes, but I seldom write a list unless I'm feeling overwhelmed and need to see each task crossed off the list when done. Good luck with the home sale, Kath!
I need lists, otherwise I forget everything. But there are times when I even forget to look at my list. And other times when I remember to look but then I am overwhelmed. One task, one minute a t a time, that is the only way to go. I have to try that soup, it sounds delicious!
I write lists but my grocery lists are often home laying at the kitchen table when I need them in the grocery store :-) I love raspberries.