Thursday
Sep092010
Slow down
September 9, 2010 * * * * * Posted by: guest blogger 
Damn, this traffic jam
How I hate to be late
It hurts my motor to go so slow
Time I get home my supper be cold
Damn, this traffic jam
James Taylor
Traffic Jam, 1977
James Taylor has long been a favorite of mine. Many of his songs mean a lot to me, identified with important milestones in my life. In the case of this song, I'm less than proud to admit it describes me well.
Like the other night. I had a good day at work, and then got to meet a friend for a glass of wine. On the way home, I got stuck at a couple of red lights – a tiny eternity passed and then just as it turns green for me to turn left, a car across the intersection turns right, so that now I have to follow them for about a mile of two lane road.
At 25 mph. On a 35 mph road. Damn this one car traffic jam.
The occupants looked like kids, with their "hoodies" pulled up over their heads. Why in the world are these kids driving so slow? I give myself a little talk. "It's only one mile. You'll live." But of course when we get to the stop sign at the end, where we turn in opposite directions, I have to steal a glance at the slow pokes ruining my evening, right? And… the driver and passengers are nuns. Yes, nuns. In habits, not hoodies. Really sorry about all the swearing, sisters, even if you couldn't hear me.
I'm what people call a "Type A" personality. You could say I don't slow down easily. Hey, it's a DNA thing, not a lifestyle!
Sometimes people get "a wakeup call" and it changes the course of their life, right? Well, I had cancer at age 28. Fortunately I was cured after a couple of operations. Slow down? Nope, I was more determined than ever to succeed. My own business was just four years old at the time. The business had already survived my back operation two years earlier. These weren't setbacks to me at the time, but challenges to be overcome so I could move on. No brakes, just throttle.
I took up photography in 2001 and decided it would be my number one hobby. All because of one picture I took with an early digital camera. I just invested a small fortune in the first Canon DSLR and a couple of lenses and went for it. I remember sitting with all my toys when they were about a week old and thinking "uh, what exactly should I take pictures of
anyway?"
Besides the day job, the husband and father roles, photography became my passion and occupied my spare time. I wanted better cameras, more lenses, and to continually improve my craft. Although I totally enjoy it and it is a break from my other responsibilities, you can probably guess by now that it's not as relaxing for me as say owning an aquarium or something. I'm always taking on a new project, volunteering for some group, anything that gets me shooting and learning.
I got an email one day from a woman who said she wanted me to be her wedding photographer. At that point I had done one wedding shoot, as a PJ (photo journalist) style shooter. She saw the shots from my one wedding and said "you are the one." Okay. No problem.
We agreed to do some engagement shots. I asked my photo buddy Dayna, who works in my company, to be my partner in the new wedding photography business. The next week the happy couple showed up at our office, so that they could follow us to the shoot location. Dayna and I "talked shop" the entire way. I had not thought of poses, or anything!
We parked at the bridge where we would begin shooting, getting out of the car, and I recall thinking "I have no idea what I'm doing!" I had not thought of poses, or anything! It was like throw the equipment in the car and it will all just work out. But now I felt like a total idiot. I had zero experience! These two were counting on me.
And then something very special happened. I won't say "life changing" but pretty important. It was like a message flew into my brain "in the moment. In the moment. You can do this." A very electric feeling. All of a sudden I was full of confidence. Our conversations and the images flowed naturally and everything just clicked along with my shutter.
This was the first time I went from Type A to what I now call Type ITM – In The Moment. Something "came over me." And it was good. I later channeled this same feeling at the wedding. I felt like I was floating. Invisible. There was no effort to capturing the special moments as they unfolded. It was as if I was meant to record them. Each a fleeting and unique moment in time and I had been chosen to capture them. It was not difficult for me to
move to this "higher plane."
Alas, I have to say that in the few years since those days I have not often found myself in Type ITM. I have experienced it, I know it is there for me to tap into. But I have let the Type A
portion of my brain keep Type ITM at bay.
I know that transitioning to Type ITM is important in my life. Besides helping with my photography, it could extend my life, and make my years left much more fulfilling. Maybe that is why it doesn't come naturally. One really has to work at the things that can have a huge impact. Even if it seems as simple as "living in the moment."
Two of my new photography friends independently advised me to “slow down” recently. I value their opinion and I’m getting the message.
Another of my James Taylor favorites:
The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time
Any fool can do it
There ain't nothing to it
Nobody knows how we got to
The top of the hill
But since we're on our way down
We might as well enjoy the ride
I have a new challenge now. Live in the moment and be fully engaged in the
passage of time.
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Special thanks to our guest, Bob Towery of Dream Tomorrow, Live Today, Cherish Yesterday. Thank you for sharing your wonderful image and words with us today.
Reader Comments (12)
Thanks for sharing those words, never heard of him, but like him a lot now that I have this
Ohhh, I do like that ITM acronym, Bob. I'll have to remember that. I'm very sure I, too, am a Type A person, so I can totally sympathize. It sounds like you live life to the full, getting in a lot of different experiences as often as possible. Maybe you're like me in that in each experience, however, it's not always easy to see all the details. Thanks for the reminder to slow down. It's a message I take seriously. Thank you for joining us today here at V&V.
Way to go Bob! "Slow down you move to fast. Got to make the morning last" Another song for ya albeit not JT. I live Chantal's comment... she had not heard of him... how is that possible!?!?!
An excellent message, Bob! I think, too often, we are in too much of a hurry to get "this" task done so we can get to the "next" task, so much so that we don't allow ourselves to enjoy the moment we are in. I like your acronym, too, Bob, and will endeavor to live ITM. Thanks for joining us today!
I enjoyed this very much. It felt as much like a journey to me as it has been for you. I'm still waiting for my ITM type to kick in. I have hope ... Love the words..Sounds to me, that in James Taylor... You've Got A Friend. ;o)
I love James Taylor, have seen him perform in Holland a couple of times. Love your vision and verb, thanks for sharing
So important to slow down...to live in that moment and experience it for what it is. I like to think that the first one to the finish line loses - yup! In this game called 'life' - it's true.
And - I too - have experienced that feeling of getting completely lost behind my camera's lens..soaking it all in and just being present for presence's sake.
Thank-you for your wonderful and inspiring post. Wonderful montage of images!
Bob, I had no idea that you were sick. You have such a joie de vie that one would never know. In any case, I love love love your photos. And I love our friendship too.
ITM - love it.
Oh yes, I am there, needing to slow down and enjoy the moment and working hard at both... a Type A personality makes it tough to relax. I am getting better at the ITM part...learning to let a lot of things go in order to have that. Some days it's a choice, others it's not, but when it is, I try to make the right one.
Great post, filled with good lessons.
Thanks to all for the kind comments. I enjoyed writing the piece and special thanks to Toni for editing it down to the size needed here. This weekend I'm off for a big photo shoot so hopefully I'll be Type ITM, wish me luck. Thanks for letting me participate in V&V.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? JT one of my favorites as well.