Solitude
March 1, 2012 
My good friends say that I am a "social introvert." I know the social rules, I enjoy people, but I love time to myself. Perhaps, I need solitude more than some, but I stopped measuring my differences a long time ago. Theodore Roosevelt said, "Comparison is the thief of joy," and I agree. Whatever gets you through, good for you! For me, I'll take a deserted beach, a brisk winter day with snow that is devoid of life's footprints, and the quiet of running water in an old-fashioned darkroom.
You guessed it. I love spending hours mixing and pouring chemistry. I love the warm glow of my safe lights. I like all the time it takes to make test prints, and I get chills watching my image appear in a tray. I love being alone with my negative strips and timers. These hours of creating, calculating, and waiting are my yoga, my tai chi, and fill me with a joy that I can't get cloning, layering, or blurring.
This is just the way it is for me. It's probably why I love snowstorms that make driving hazardous, forcing me to stay home and enjoy the quiet. "Sorry, I can't make it. Traveler's advisory...." So, whatever it is that brings you peace, fulfillment, and inspiration, may you it be yours today....
Photography, darkrooms, solitude, winter
Reader Comments (23)
I am all for solitude, not much of a social one myself as for parties. I do like to do my own stuff in my own time and pace. But I also like to connect to people, a constant struggle for balance it is.
Oh...Honey - I could have written this post myself. I'm looking forward to the day when I stop apologizing for my need to be alone...when I stop comparing myself to others...when I learn to fully accept and embrace my internal social introvert! Thank-you for giving me the gift of 'permission' today!
Beautiful post!
"I know the social rules, I enjoy people"...is something I know to be true about you, Honey, because of how I see you on Facebook. To read about this other side of you makes me see you as one who understands and needs balance. We all fit on different ends of the introvert-extrovert spectrum, of course, and it's a challenge for all of us to "marry" the strength and weakness of who we are in this regard. My guess is a little (more) solitude goes a long way in achieving that balance!
Beautiful vision and verb!
How well I understand that love of snowstorms (or in our case, fog or tropical storms). Enforced solitude always is a gift to me, something I celebrate.
As for relationships with people - generally, when I begin to feel more lonely when I'm with a person than when I'm not, it's time to move on, even if it means adding a bit more solitude to my life!
I have become more social as I age -- less self conscious, less worries about fitting in. But with that, I have also come to more deeply recognize that I need that alone time. It's not even a desire, it's a physical, mental, and emotional need. You have expressed this love of alone time and the creativity that can come from it so beautifully. Thank you for starting out my day with a contemplation about what can give me peace, fulfillment, and inspiration today.
Maery Rose has written exactly my response to this wonderful V&V entry by Honey. I am a social extrovert (a change from my youth) who is currently in a very isolated period. When it comes to my photography, I do enjoy shooting with a friend or two--but most of the time you will find me exploring backroads on my own. I love that solitude and its freedom to explore the way I want to and to create the images that speak to me from seldom traveled roads. Wonderful topic and discussion today!
This perfect image that you created and shared has brought me all that and more ~ a beautiful beginning to the day.
I so relate to this. I was accused so often growing up, by my own father, of being in my own little world. Was that a bad thing? I liked it there. Now my two sisters and one brother are all realtors. I'm a writer. Go figure. And I love the Roosevelt quote. What a beautiful way to start my day. Thank you.
What a lovely post! I love solitude. Your photograph, a picture of solitude, absolutely grabbed my heart! Thank you for your vision and verb today - I am not alone in my solitude!
Profound image Honey! I love the word solitude....feels good to roll the letters around inside the mouth...I can hear your joy and inner peace.
Me? Today's my last day of this job; that's my peace for the day!
yes, i am right there with you. and i have stopped apologizing for it as well. i need, literally, need time by myself. fortunately, working from home gives me much of what i need.
and also, the rituals you describe in your darkroom, i think those sort of things are so important. sometimes the process means as much as the art.
a lovely, lovely post!
My time in the darkroom used to be my greatest refuge. Immersion in photography came at a time in my life (my children were all young adolescents) when I desperately needed solitude in order to replenish. I still have that need, but have much greater access now to time alone. Your photograph gives the essence of the blanket of quiet that snow brings to the world. Love it!
I love that Roosevelt quote, so true. A friend of mine really needs to learn this. Wonderful post.
Oh Honey, what a beautiful post, and how much do I love your photo. I need solitude as well, I am quite happy with my own company, although I cherish the hours that I spend with a close friend as well. Time spent in my studio is one of the best parts of my day. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy the company of other people, but we really have to connect so that I can feel this way. But time spent alone - the best ever.
Oh, and I have to add that I love the quote by Roosevelt. I'm learning to not compare myself to others - sometimes that is very hard, especially when I'm beating up myself, again.
I have said on more than one occasion, being alone does not mean being lonely. Exceptionally nice image accompanying this wonderful post. Thank you.
I love to spend time alone and am quite happy to do so. Then I relish the party and the group, but only for so long. Half a dozen of one and six of the other I guess.
A lovely post, and one I certainly can relate to. A beautiful image, too. I love the light glowing out of the center of the image.
i do miss those wondeful darkroom days.... a huge part of my 20s was spent in one, loving those times for exactly the reasons you write about. now, older and somewhat wiser, i have also come to realise that i need at least an hour a day of 'my own time'.... if not more! i get irritable if i don't get peace and solitude, just time to rebalance, read, write....
Well, I'm a bit of a social introvert myself! Getting old made me feel less guilty of being so, and now I enjoy being an introvert more then ever :) Your pic is so beautiful - the kind of place I'd love to be to regenerate myself. Great post!
It's interesting how we change as we age. During my corporate America years when I got home I would go in my backyard and pull weeds to find solitude from the rat race of work. Now I find solitude in the many hours of photographing...but I hope to never lose my love of being with people! It's having both that makes life so wonderful! Enjoyed your post!
I love this honey...yes, there's a travel advisory. I will be using that...
The magic of your dark room creations seems to be so exhilarating, Honey. I love this term social introvert, quite an interesting combination :-)